Question by : I get overly emotional inside for no reason am I bipolar?
At first I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety/depression awhile back after seeing a psychologist. I have adhd issues as well and zone out and can’t focus all the time and get bored really easily, no matter who is talking. Take meds when needed for that adhd. No offense to anyone that I’m around, I will get bored with anything. I’m a 28 year old male. I never really had full panic attacks, just get anxious and worried a lot, but when I’m by myself, from time to time I will get overly emotional and start to cry, but I hold back my tears, because I know it’s random. I’m a guy. I get this intense feeling too, like my mood is randomly changing for no reason. I still think of sad things though while this is happening which is partly because I’m depressed. But, I can always find something to do like writing rap lyrics, finding a comfort spot, listen to music, or quickly flip thoughts which helps me. But, I just don’t understand the random mood changes, it’s not like anxiety either, but it still causes me the worry feeling? I think I might be bi polar, my mom is. I know bi polar is hard to diagnose and isn’t it usually diagnosed later in life? Sometimes I will get mad for no reason, and I will yell at my computer and want to throw my tv remote against the wall or something when I get impatient, but I actually haven’t thrown any object in a long time, I’ve learned to deal with it somewhat. It’s usually over stupid, random things I will have outbursts. Right now, I’m normal, and feel euphoric. But, people with bipolar usually spend a lot of money and gamble it a lot during their mood swings. I go to internet sweepstakes to gamble, but only each time I get paid and only spend 5 bucks to play the casino entries, so that’s not a problem But, I also feel like I’m not wanted by anyone. I have friends, and we hang out, but I think I feel not wanted for no apparent reason, even by my relatives. I get these random mood swings, and during those mood swings I won’t want to go to work the next day because I’m crying inside and than I’m happy again right after. I feel really awkward in social situations at a bar that’s crowded, or any large get together, or even around new people. And, I want to go have fun, and I drink moderately and safetly, but I hate going out, even if it’s to a large chicken stew or someone’s family’s party with a bunch of people. I only work the weekends and one day a week now all day, which it’s hard to do that even. Luckily I work at a vet’s office, and animals help me calm down, but I still don’t want to get up and go to work, but I do anyways, and enjoy my co workers, worked there for years. I think I have some avoidant-personality disorder because I don’t make that much money, but when I do have it, I just make up excuses not to go places or hang out. I think all these random mood changes might play a role, but in certain situations like I’m at home by myself, I feel fine, accept when my overly emotional feelings come for no reason, and I think I’m not wanted. I’ll go out and do stuff with friends, but it’s usually a small get together, where we are hanging out at the house. I can order food at fast food places and run to the store without feeling scared, but I just don’t want to hang out in public or be in crowds because of my avoidant personality. I really think I’m either bi polar or may even have Asperger’s a little, although I don’t know that much about Asperger’s, but I feel uncomfortable a lot around some people, but some people I feel safely attached with. Some co workers I will avoid, even though they are cool and nice, I just speak to them when I have to, even though I want to talk more. Others who I feel comfortable with I will talk to. These are just basic examples. When I was a young kid, until I was 7, I went through a lot of therapy because I had hypotonia (low muscle tone). I worked on my fine and gross motor skills, which became better over the years, so I’m good from that now, or am I? People don’t know what’s really wrong with me. My friends don’t. I can hold myself in, enough to be functionable and have some fun, but I really want to get the hanging out over with and go back home, because I am so uncomfortable. Sometimes I’m good and improve, but a lot of times I just want to be by myself. I hold my feelings and emotions in with my friends, but I just tell them I get really stressed like anyone would, and depressed here and there, to cover up how I’m feeling, because I don’t want to let them know I feel unwanted, but I’m sure they notice some things different about me. I have gone to anxiety groups, but quit those, just don’t like going in the groups even though it’s helpful, just rather be alone.
Answer by Anne-Marie
The average age of onset for bipolar disorder is 22, but it can be earlier or later by about 7 years or so.
Your symptoms do not lead me to believe that you have had manic episode, aside from your rambling question… people experiencing mania have decreased sleep, racing thoughts, rambling and pressured speech, grandiosity and/or irritability, and often engage in high-risk behaviors, can be spending but can also be drinking too much, promiscuity, etc.
You may suffer from avoidant personality, but that can be overcome through conscious effort. The anxiety group sounds like a great resource.
You sound more depressed and anxious to me… I suggest talk therapy and a trail of an SSRI, which will help treat the depression as well as the anxiety. Good luck!